{"id":868,"date":"2025-12-14T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2025-12-14T12:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/?p=868"},"modified":"2025-12-12T17:31:09","modified_gmt":"2025-12-12T17:31:09","slug":"fearless-leadership","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/2025\/12\/14\/fearless-leadership\/","title":{"rendered":"Enhance your leadership by becoming fearless with my December 2025 guest Dr Benjamin Ritter"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"Benjamin<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Dr. Benjamin Ritter <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dr. Benjamin Ritter, is an award-winning leadership and career coach, author of the Amazon best-seller Becoming Fearless, and founder of Live for Yourself (LFY) Consulting. He spreads the message of becoming fearless in your career and life as a Top LinkedIn Voice, and host of two podcasts, The Executive and Live Fearlessly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Have a listen \/ watch to their interviews here:
Spotify: https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/episode\/21MfEBq2GvnDN20Joz4GxL?si=expa-eKIQAuTVWwfCDFWZw<\/a>
YouTube: https:\/\/youtu.be\/hZXX4vxdG-s<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

For other pod services, jump to here<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ben has coached over 500 leaders with a strong focus on senior-level executives across multiple industries and geographic regions, within organizations that have included names such as Amazon, Coursera, DoorDash, Google, Fiserv, Northwestern, Mayo Clinic, Pinterest, Yelp, and more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ben\u2019s passions include working with Better for You CPG organizations, small business founders and minority-owned companies, for which he offers pro-bono coaching services.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Born and raised in Chicago, Illinois, Ben now resides in Austin, Texas, with his partner, Tiffany, Squirt, a \u201crebel in a shell\u201d turtle, Elwood, a scruffy rescue pup, and Sima, the kitty queen of their kingdom.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ben possesses a Doctorate in Organizational Leadership with focus on value congruence and job satisfaction, an MBA in entrepreneurial management, and an MPH in health policy administration.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Social Media Channels:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

LinkedIn: \u2060https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/drbenjaminritter-leadershipdevelopment\/\u2060<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

YouTube: https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/@DrBenjaminRitter<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Instagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/drbenjaminritter<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Website: \u2060https:\/\/www.liveforyourselfconsulting.com\/\u2060<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Podcast: \u2060https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/live-for-yourself-revolution-podcast-living-toward\/id1151625064\u2060<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2060https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/the-executive-podcast\/id1588458800\u2060<\/a>\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Support the show.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you’d like to support the show, you can now buy mea coffee, beer, or whatever you’d like. Click here: \u2060 \u2060https:\/\/www.buymeacoffee.com\/sundaylunchpm\u2060<\/a>\u2060<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should soon be able to grab a copy of my books and my guests’ books here soon \u2060\u2060https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/amazonshop\u2060<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Affilliates<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Online PM Courses: \u2060https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/onlinepmcourses\u2060<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

Benjamin’s Transcript<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

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Today I am delighted to welcome Dr Benjamin Ritter to the show. He is an award-winning leadership<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and career coach and author of the Amazon bestseller “Becoming Fearless” and founder<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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of “Live Fear Self Consulting”. He spreads a message of becoming fearless in your career<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and life as a top linked invoice and host of two podcasts, “The Executive and Live Fearless”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and “The Executive” is coached over 500 leaders with a strong focus on senior level executives<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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across multiple industries and geographic regions with organisations that have included<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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names such as Amazon, Coursera, DoorDash, Google, Fisher, Northwestern, Mayo Clinic, Pinterest,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Yelp and many many more. His passions include working with the better for you CPG organisations,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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small business founders and minority owned companies for which he offers pro bono coaching services.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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So Ben, welcome to the show.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Thanks for having me and I’m excited to be here. I feel like I need to update the bio though<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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because LinkedIn, I don’t know if you knew this, got rid of their top voice designations per topic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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So that was an executive coach top voice. I was like a talent development top voice and then<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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now they’re only like giving those blue marks, kind of like Twitter or something does to some of the<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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bigger names and I think what’s interesting is you kind of go on those podcast circuits and you get<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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a lot of those like really high caliber gas which have so much wisdom and so much information<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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to share and I want to find the shows that kind of have the lesser named guests. So hopefully<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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in my career I stay lesser name and I can get on all these shows and share some unique and niche<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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information about career fearlessness and ultimately living for yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Yeah, brilliant. I’m lucky to have you all know. I screwed. Don’t you’ve been too famous and then<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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not being able to come on. Yeah, I know. Sometimes like people reach out and like, hey Ben,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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you want to do this thing? I was like, no, no, that would make me too famous. I need to stay kind of a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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nice dealist celebrity, you know, yeah. I don’t want the red carpet. I want like the beige carpet and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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then we’re okay. Yeah, that sounds good. That sounds good. So obviously from your sense of humor,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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you kind of chilled person. Where are you from? You grow up and pick up your accent but they probably<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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won’t be able to work out exactly where you’re from, especially if you’re British. That was about to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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make up an accent which never goes well. I’ve been told never to do that. So I’m from Chicago,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Illinois, born and raised, actually lived in London for about six months when I was pursuing a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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professional soccer career and then I’ve come back and then went back and forth from California<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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for a bit and then now live in good old Austin, Texas for about five years and love it. Call it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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home. It’s kind of a hub for health and wellness and entrepreneurs. No, one really. So obviously,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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that’s interesting. I’ve not picked up on the soccer career before and it was, I’ll probably dive<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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down in that. So tell me a little bit about that. Just just give us a little snippet. What was that about?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Oh, I did it shape some of the things that you’re doing. Yeah, so football for people that maybe<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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haven’t heard the word soccer before. I don’t even know why there’s two words still in 2025, but<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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we’ll see. So your side of the pond is is that throwing ball, isn’t it? Yeah, I guess.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I refuse to take the word soccer. That’s what it is. So soccer was truly important for helping me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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become who I am today because you had the pain of loss creates a lot of growth. It also taught me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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a lot of things around resilience and being driven and setting a goal and achieving it and taught me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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that I could push my body and my mind to places that I didn’t think was possible. And it taught me a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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lot of things about collaboration and working together in leadership. Most importantly though, it taught<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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me that the advice to find your purpose was false and wrong. And actually the first talk I ever gave<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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for this business, for this career was the worst advice I ever received was find your purpose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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And basically talks about how I gave soccer so much of myself. I defined myself by this external thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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And by doing so, I ended up sourcing my validation, my confidence from that thing, which isn’t<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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something that I had much control over. And I dedicated way too much of my time and energy and effort<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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to the sport. And so I didn’t develop other skills, other areas, social relationships. And so when I<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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lost that thing, I had no idea who I was. I had no identity. And so I spent about four or five years<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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kind of digging myself out of that hole and creating who I was. Now that taught me those that it’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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great to be fearless. It’s great to have confidence. It’s great to explore life. But then eventually,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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you end up feeling lost anyways because you have no direction. And so then it kind of taught me the<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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importance of value, alignment and actually having a direction with that confidence and with that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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fearlessness. And you know, brought me to coaching, a brought me to personal development,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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because I had to figure out who I was. And it really was the cornerstone of foundation to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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everything that I teach and everything that I am today.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Well, so I think it might have something that would influence. And that’s both all of us have<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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the thing, well, who we are now is defined by what we’ve done and what we’ve experienced and how<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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we’ve reacted to those. And I think one of the things that interested me from the point of view of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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your work is the fact that we’ve got within project management and within project management<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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for years, I find this quite a lot. And I find this myself is moving quite frequently. You’re moving<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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projects, removing roles. And sometimes you’re kind of just following the path of where the next<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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world comes and you don’t necessarily make those choices. But those choices are not made because<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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the next projects come up. And like you can just go, right, there’s the next one, there’s the next one,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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right? And it’s new and therefore moving you forward. But it isn’t necessarily a choice for a conscious<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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choice for your career. And I think it’s quite easy for us as project managers to just follow on to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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the next project rather than seek out the next project. And I just wonder whether some of the things<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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you’re talking about being fearless in looking at your career, when you look at the next project management,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I’m going to view whether you work in project managers and how they’ve kind of got in a rut, but it’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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a, it doesn’t feel like a rut because it’s a new project all the time. Yeah, there’s some constant<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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aspect of novelty that can come along with kind of new projects. And you can kind of feel like you’re<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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learning things new, but have no control over what you’re learning or you’re involved in, especially<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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if you’re not managing up or taking control of your career or crafting it. It’s also a really interesting<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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field because one toxic individual can completely derail everything. And project managers have to be<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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kind of these connectors and collaborators and influencers. And generally, they don’t have a high level<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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of authority to do that. Authority without the position. But generally, they need executive stakeholders<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and other leaders that are actually moving things forwards and competing priorities. I know we didn’t<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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talk about that, but generally just from the aspect of job satisfaction and engagement and growth,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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you know, oftentimes a project manager is put where they’re needed, not where they want. And it would,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I, but who’ve anyone within their careers, especially project managers, if they haven’t yet, to really<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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sit down and figure out what are the things that are going to help them grow within their industry?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Is it a certain scope of project? Is it working with certain departments? Is it working<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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towards certain outcomes with uncertain KPIs? Is there a certain part of the company you’re in<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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or the industry that you want to become involved in become an expert? Because what’s so beautiful<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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about being a project manager is that if you’re on a project, you become an expert in that industry,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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in that field without even having to be like an employee within it. But oftentimes we don’t have that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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level of intention. I’d love to hear any perspective on this. I mean, we can talk about kind of how to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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have that intention and how to manage up, but I don’t know if you see this as an issue too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, it’s something that I’ve lived in a number of different organizations,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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but I’ve lived in one organization where I’ve been both lucky and also possibly stagnation as well<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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in some ways that I’ve had multiple different technologies that I’ve been working. So as you say,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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about becoming the expert in something I’d never touched networks or anything to do with that at one<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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point in whilst I wouldn’t be able to configure networks. I worked for nine months in an area that was<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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around the networks running teams who were delivering networks changes. And I became knowledge about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I’ve worked in SAP, I’ve worked in ERP systems and again, not knowing the nuts and bolts, but<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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become, aren’t you, get to understand them and you understand them enough to be able to ask the stupid<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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questions, and I say, but, but, but you don’t get. So I’ve been very lucky from that point of you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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have been able to jump into those different roles, but then there’s been reorganisations, then there’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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been different technology coming in and it’s kind of, as you say, they haven’t always been, uh,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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right, that’s the next step and that’s the next bit of technology I want to move into and that’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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what I want to do and it’s a couple of times that have been, but I have found sometimes it’s kind of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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you sit there and you think, what, how did I, how did I end up here and what, why, did I choose to be here?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Was it my, did I have a choice really? And you obviously always do have a choice, but it was that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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thing, did I let someone ask me that choice for me rather than challenge that choice and then<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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take a risk of sitting there going, oh, I’m, I’ve got the not the right project, I’ve just got a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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project if you know me. So beautiful about project management is not everyone might want a project<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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manager, but everyone needs one and you go in an organisation and your KPIs aren’t being met or<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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the goals are, you know, they have some broad goals. You could very easily get assigned to that project<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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just by showing their interest in it, you know, depending on how the, how they end up distributing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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projects, some people don’t even have like a project management office. So it kind of depends on<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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the size of the company that you’re a part of, but you can really get involved in almost any major<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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project within an organisation because they need you. And I don’t know if a lot of project managers<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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realize that like they’re needed and they are wanted, even if the people that want them don’t know<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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that yet. And so, yeah, what are the goals, you know, that you have for your career? What are the things<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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that you want to learn? And can you map those out and can you share those with the people that are<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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generally responsible for assigning projects or starting projects? And I also see generally that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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project managers tend to be a little reactive to the projects that are assigned to them instead of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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actually helping choose what projects are prioritised or what projects are considered. And sometimes<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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they lead that, leave it to the senior leadership or senior managers, but who has communication<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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with almost every single department and function within an organisation, generally project managers?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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And I think they might be able to see some of the gaps that a little bit more clearly and maybe<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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could have a little bit more of a voice. And not only do you help your career, but you help the company.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Yeah, I agree. I think there are, there are, you’ve got your finger in a lot of pies, you’ve got that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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cross. And I’ve heard this talk about before, that in many ways when you, if you work within a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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largest organisation with multiple departments and you deliver projects in all of those departments,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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or delivering projects that cross those departments, you get that unique cross departmental<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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understanding of an organisation again, at a certain 20,000 feet view. But that does put you in<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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a position where actually when you, in theory, if it was viable, moving up through an organisation<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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into the CEO kind of roles and then the CEO roles, they’re actually put, well, position as PMs,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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whilst you’re not, because quite often you’ll get those roles where someone will come in,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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they’ll be the finance director, they’ll be the sales director that come in and they have brilliant<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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at their vertical, but then don’t have that breadth. Whereas the project manager may not have the<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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depth of the breadth of that knowledge, which sometimes I think maybe I don’t know if you found it with<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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the, the CEOs that sometimes can be really useful to have that breadth of understanding of your<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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organisation. Yeah, when I think of an executive project manager, I think of like the chief of staff,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and it’s the person that controls everything is able to influence, is able to know what’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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important, most important for an organisation. I’ve never known an organisation, executive team,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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or myself as a coach coming in, to be told that the project manager was too directive,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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or gave too much feedback, or, like generally, the project manager role is seen as someone who’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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intelligent, informative, and knows what needs, what gears need to turn, keeps everyone accountable,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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but oftentimes is a little too soft in terms of their own career and what needs to happen<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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within the project itself. And like the idea of fearlessness for someone that’s in this role,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I think is crucial for them to stand out from the pack and to meet expectations and be able to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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drive results in an organisation. Yeah, I think, I think you’re right, I think some other things in<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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any staff, I was talking to them on the other day about the fact that you’ve got the project manager<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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role being quite a lonely role in that, and a lot of accountability, responsibility conflict,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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because tend to be the, if the project goes well, the team involved in doing that project,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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did a brilliant job, not the project manager, not from an organisation point of view, but the project<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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manager’s tend to step to the side. That’s my experience anyway. And then, if there’s a problem,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and if it’s gone wrong somewhere, the project manager steps up and says, “I’m a, it’s me,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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my team didn’t know, there may be specifics in there, but again, they accept that responsibility<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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as part of what we do, we accept accountability for the failure, but not necessarily accountability<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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for the success of something,” which goes to that point that you’re saying there, where you,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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that means that senior people only see the project manager when there is a problem,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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they only get a visibility of that when there’s a problem. And again, 90 percent of it, people<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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throw numbers around about how many projects are successful and not successful, but 90 percent<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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of the work that we do is, is successful. Now, the outcomes may not always be successful based<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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on whatever measure you use, but most of your projects can deliver right, as many parts of it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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aren’t, that mean that something else happens, and so there’s a lot of really good stuff done,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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it’s same with all of us, it’s like a feedback in it when you’re giving people feedback. If you’re<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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only giving people feedback on things they do wrong, that’s a really small part of the brilliant job<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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they do, where they do lots of things really well, unless they’re really terrible, and if they’re<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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doing 90 percent of their job badly, why are you still employing them? It’s, it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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it’s just crazy, and I suppose, for me, just kind of linking to your book and, and, and your, um,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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consulting with the YouTube, what, what is it that made you write the book? What, what made you think,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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actually, there’s a book that is going to help people here? What was the reason?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Yeah, I spent probably half of my early career, I mean, I’m almost a decade,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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kind of blaming other people for my current situation and holding myself back from creating a job<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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that I could truly say that I cared about, and that’s wasted time, I’m never going to get back.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I had toxic leadership around me, so what? I wasn’t in a job that I thought was, you’re<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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meaningful, the perfect so what? And, you know, why, why does that mean I go in and work and waste my<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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time and waste my day? And despite being a high performer, I didn’t feel like I was working towards<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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anything, but because I was choosing not to work towards anything significant, you know, I could have<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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been forming relationships, I could have been learning skills, I could have been a little bit more<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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proactive towards my future career, but more importantly, my day-to-day happiness. And so that led me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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to create life for yourself, consulting, and go into the field of leadership development,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and everything that has been important to me throughout my career, even going all the way back<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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to soccer, it comes down to being fearless. It comes down to not being concerned about what<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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someone thinks is the right thing to do, and more so caring about what you feel is the right thing to do<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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for yourself and for your career. And so it was time to write a book, it was time to get that message<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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out there and more to help people feel more fearless in their careers and in their life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Everything that I’ve seen that holds people back generally relates to some aspect of fear,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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permission to self, some level of confidence, maybe a clarity towards what they truly want,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and they’re getting in their own way in terms of what that is, to being able to craft an<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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environment that matters to them. And when we look at our job, generally it’s, I’m not telling people<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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what I feel like they need to hear, so I’m not giving direct feedback. I’m not being open about<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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what I need to my boss, and I’m not speaking up to make sure that those things actually occur<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and are heard. And I don’t feel that I actually have, you know, trusted myself or my job, and I’m<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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fear for my safety or for my financial future, or just in general just having a position. And so I’m<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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not willing to take that action. And if we could all just be fearless in our careers, I mean,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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leadership would improve, jobs would improve, organizations would improve, and people would be doing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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things that they truly love so their productivity wouldn’t improve. So ultimately outcomes would improve,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I think it could really make a difference. Yeah, I can, it’s really echoes with me there, because I’ve<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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been, I’ve been in situation where I have thought I’m stuck in a situation and stuck with an organization,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I can’t leave that organization, nothing will go well. And then that organization said, we don’t<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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need you anymore. And actually, each time that has had ever happened, I’ve ended up in an<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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organization in a better role with more money, with more autonomy, more responsibility, and more,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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what I wanted. And sometimes I think there’s that, you say that fear, I wouldn’t have left out<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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those organizations, but they weren’t probably fulfilling me and they weren’t taking me where I would<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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have needed to go. But the ones that I did step into, and you could say it’s a bit luck, you could say<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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it’s a bit of a vado sometimes, because I think my, I quite psyche me, I kind of don’t fear<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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looking silly, you know, fear failing, and something, and I talk to my kids about it, about,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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about failing is what you need to do in order to get better at something. My youngest,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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judo is kind of like, do judo, you fall over a lot and you’re rubbish, stonophones, and it’s hard,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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but over time you’re still rubbish, but every sort of when you’re lucky, and then over time you get a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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bit better, but every sort of when you’re unlucky, and then it changes without, but the thing is if you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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if you compete without feet with, with, with fear, you won’t attempt to attack and you won’t attempt<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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to throw. If you don’t attempt to attack and you don’t attempt to throw, you won’t win, because you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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will get thrown because of the fear, and like, that’s kind of how I kind of link them together,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and then over time as you become, and then say if you become not quite fearless, but controlled<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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fearless in what you’re doing in an unadjudgment, then you can make things happen, it kind of,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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it just draws some alignment there from what you’re saying is that you’ve got to risk something<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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to get those benefits. Yeah, I wish that moving towards our goals wasn’t seen as a risk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Yeah, because I remember even from the field as you share about judo,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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hesitation is the enemy that causes you to to to lose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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The person that is operating, you know, by instinct or by skill or by experience can get into a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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state of flow, and that state of flow is where you really can shine. It’s, it is, is a place where you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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are almost superhuman, if you look into any sort of flow research. What I would love to do, I hope in<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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the future that the word fear doesn’t exist. I don’t think it’s ever going to happen, but we’ve labeled<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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a normal reaction to discomfort and the unknown and to concern as something that is unbelievably negative.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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When in essence, it’s just information, it’s data. If you were on a project and someone started<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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sharing their feelings about something, you know, great, who else is feeling this way? Great. What do we<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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want to do about it? What do we, what practices do we need to institute? How can we adjust our approach?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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What is our, you don’t change the goal? But oftentimes if we feel fear in our career, we go,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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oh, that information means we need to change our goal and change how we act. And that is basically<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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doing a disservice to ourselves. And that’s what really becoming fearless is. It’s not that, like, it’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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not that you’re never going to experience fear. It’s kind of just redefining it as data and information,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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just like you would on a project and then figuring out what you can do about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Well, that’s really, that’s really good with look at it because it’s, it’s, I say, it’s just feedback,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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isn’t it? It’s just, it’s, it’s that whole thing that you burn your hand out of hand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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You don’t suddenly never pick up a pen again. You just make sure you grab a cloth first and pick<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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up a pen, don’t you? It’s going to, but it’s a learning experience. And like you talked about those,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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what you learned from the soccer and the, where you went all in on that and then you’re 10 years.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Actually, without those items of learning through all of those, what isn’t working, which is,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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again, part of that feedback and understanding, then at some point, you’ve got to change. It’s,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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it wouldn’t make you, you are, and where you are, and what you’re doing now because you wouldn’t<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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have had that negative experience to actually feed into what you’re doing now, would you really?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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It’s, it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s kind of, it’s kind of, I know it, it’s kind of intuitive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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But sometimes, though, this experience, bad experiences, I’ve had awful customers, awful projects,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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terrible teams before and now over the years, but I’ve learned every single time, something from<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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the host that I’m making mistakes. Yeah, but in the moment at times, they can feel like they’re<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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world ending. Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. So we let temporary emotions dictate our future<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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opportunities, which is just a bad equation. I think so, you know, I’m going to be silent on this,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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in this team meeting, when someone is disrupting it with negativity because I’m afraid of embarrassing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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myself or causing conflict, but now I’ve completely poisoned the entire project because I wasn’t<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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willing to stick up or give direct feedback to the person. Or I’m in a career and I keep<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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you in a signed project that I feel like are too junior for me, but I don’t go talk to my manager<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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about it and define my goals and lean into them like a mentor and because there’s strategies to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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each of these things that you want to accomplish, but you don’t do that and all of a sudden now you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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hold yourself back in your career five or 10 years, maybe 15 years, and then ultimately they let,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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they let you go anyways. So then you’re going to look for a new job and all you have to show for it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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are you’re doing your projects. Yeah, yeah, it’s it when you look at the potentials of the risk of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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inaction in some of these situations is worse and it’s it’s with human nature is the discomfort now<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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compared to the discomfort in the future, you don’t, you, you can’t try to avoid the discomfort now, don’t you?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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So generally you have to explore what the fear is and too often though we feel fear we go oh I need to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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be afraid and we run or we freeze or we just don’t we avoid the thing, but fear is dealing with fear<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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means you have to deal with being uncomfortable. It doesn’t mean you have to do anything first. It means<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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that you actually have to just explore what you’re feeling and what what are the rational thoughts that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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are aligned to this specific feeling. So you bring rationality to the emotional response instead of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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pushing in a way you get closer to it. That’s just the first step and you don’t even have to take any<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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action. I’m not telling everyone they have to jump jump off the cliff into the into the bucket of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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you know the the chasm of their fears. I’m saying that you just have to start exploring them<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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and through that exploration we can end up coming up with some sort of action because any small<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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action into discomfort actually makes that discomfort more comfortable and eventually we end up<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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in taking enough little actions where we’ve completely changed our world and our career.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Nice brilliant. This is so what you’re saying there really is the from what I’m hearing is that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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it’s that take that kind of the advice you have quite about getting angry but fear as well is that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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take that 10 seconds to let yourself feel take that time to let yourself be afraid let yourself be<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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like you wouldn’t do with any emotions but be those emotions and then understand once you’ve<\/p>\n\n\n\n

269
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said okay that’s happening then understand why is that happening then decide if you want to change<\/p>\n\n\n\n

270
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it and then make the actions to do that sort of thing that kind of feels but from from my brain<\/p>\n\n\n\n

271
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and so what practical sort of things do you say to put it like that’s obviously a massive thing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

272
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as soon as we feel fear you take ownership of it kind of in that scenario don’t you but<\/p>\n\n\n\n

273
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what are the some of the sorts of tips and tricks that you’ve got in your book and in your coach and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

274
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that you tell the we’re not giving away the whole farb you know. There’s 65 strategies so I can’t<\/p>\n\n\n\n

275
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give out the farm right now but we can we can take a look at a specific example so the book is written<\/p>\n\n\n\n

276
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in each page it’s kind of its own a light bulb moment with an action and a quote basically it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

277
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starts off with the topic and ask questions to see if you kind of feel that fear in the situation<\/p>\n\n\n\n

278
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explains what that fear is and then gives a suggestion for it. So for example you know one of them<\/p>\n\n\n\n

279
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is like avoid burning out but I think we’re talking about more around job satisfaction and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

280
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leadership and such. So I mean some of them are pretty simple like lead with optimism you know how do<\/p>\n\n\n\n

281
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you respond others complain and as a project manager I bet you’re in a room with a bunch of people<\/p>\n\n\n\n

282
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that are generally pretty negative or complaining and the easiest way to build camaraderie it seems<\/p>\n\n\n\n

283
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like generally is to share those complaints. The problem is you’re the leader of the group<\/p>\n\n\n\n

284
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and so if you share those complaints now all of a sudden you are a source of negativity and you’ve<\/p>\n\n\n\n

285
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kind of given permission to it. So basically the book says maintaining a positive attitude or<\/p>\n\n\n\n

286
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it can be challenging especially when it involves other people complaining. Aligning with others<\/p>\n\n\n\n

287
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negative views can be a way to strengthen relationships so it creates a dilemma between trying to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

288
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stay positive and the need to fit in. However for those aspiring to grow professionally negativity can<\/p>\n\n\n\n

289
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tarnish your reputation and prevent an opportunity to motivate others towards greater organizational goals.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

290
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And so the very straightforward kind of in your face directive is always find the positive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

291
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If you want to grow in your career it’s on you to be the voice of optimism. If you notice a problem<\/p>\n\n\n\n

292
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encourage finding a solution. Others are complaining you can empathize while still burning out<\/p>\n\n\n\n

293
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more positive aspects. The people that others want to work with and trust are champions of their<\/p>\n\n\n\n

294
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organization and the people in it. If you are bright when others cash shadows you will be the one<\/p>\n\n\n\n

295
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who stands out and others will take notice. And so the fear here is generally it’s kind of standing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

296
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out and standing out from the group and the crowd. And the problem when negative situations arise if<\/p>\n\n\n\n

297
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you’re not standing out then you are creating more negativity and you’re going to hurting your<\/p>\n\n\n\n

298
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brand than the organization and as a leader. And so the book provides a variety of suggestions like<\/p>\n\n\n\n

299
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that to take advantage of your career and to really be fearless in your life. And some people<\/p>\n\n\n\n

300
00:28:58,920 –> 00:29:02,680
hear that and they’re like well what’s the big deal? I’m a little negative. I’m not afraid in this<\/p>\n\n\n\n

301
00:29:02,680 –> 00:29:07,560
moment. Well by not speaking up and not creating the culture and the culture and the environment that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

302
00:29:07,560 –> 00:29:11,640
you want and leading and creating the brand that you want for yourself as leader within the company<\/p>\n\n\n\n

303
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you are actually bending to fear. That’s that really rings in our way because<\/p>\n\n\n\n

304
00:29:19,240 –> 00:29:24,360
I know I’ve been in situations where what generally I’m a fairly optimistic person. I think I think<\/p>\n\n\n\n

305
00:29:24,360 –> 00:29:28,680
generally the community of project managers you have to be two things. You have to be incredibly<\/p>\n\n\n\n

306
00:29:28,680 –> 00:29:35,720
skeptical but optimistic at the same time because the every project you’ve got doesn’t look like<\/p>\n\n\n\n

307
00:29:35,720 –> 00:29:41,960
it’s deliverable and every report on where we are in a status point of view doesn’t sound realistic<\/p>\n\n\n\n

308
00:29:41,960 –> 00:29:47,000
and there were always say you know you’ve kind of got to have that balance of optimism and skepticism<\/p>\n\n\n\n

309
00:29:47,640 –> 00:29:52,360
and I’ve generally been the one who can look at the positive look at what if we do this what<\/p>\n\n\n\n

310
00:29:52,360 –> 00:29:59,960
the options and that and I found myself in certain situations where I’ve dug when someone’s dug a hole<\/p>\n\n\n\n

311
00:29:59,960 –> 00:30:06,760
and they’re in it I’ve got in and took a spade off them and dug them deeper because I and that’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

312
00:30:06,760 –> 00:30:10,760
what I’ve been in not a good place from a mental health point of view or from a work point of view<\/p>\n\n\n\n

313
00:30:11,400 –> 00:30:19,880
my I found my attitude changes on that and sometimes I spot it sometimes I don’t spot it until<\/p>\n\n\n\n

314
00:30:19,880 –> 00:30:25,800
quite a bit later and it’s kind of like how have I got to get myself back into that and I think there’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

315
00:30:25,800 –> 00:30:33,080
there’s a thing of the middle manager there was a podcast I don’t know I remember the name of it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

316
00:30:33,080 –> 00:30:37,960
now there’s like the grumpy middle manager something like that from a few years ago<\/p>\n\n\n\n

317
00:30:39,000 –> 00:30:46,040
because whether it be project managers or any middle management you you’re in that situation where<\/p>\n\n\n\n

318
00:30:46,040 –> 00:30:51,480
you’ve got to be you may your organisation is doing something and you don’t agree with it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

319
00:30:51,480 –> 00:30:56,840
and you don’t like what’s going on with it and you think it’s the wrong thing to do but somehow<\/p>\n\n\n\n

320
00:30:56,840 –> 00:31:04,120
you’ve still got to get the to your team on board with delivering with that or being part of that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

321
00:31:06,120 –> 00:31:09,880
the kind of empathise with the fact that yeah I agree I don’t think this is the right thing but<\/p>\n\n\n\n

322
00:31:09,880 –> 00:31:15,080
but it’s really hard and I think it’s really hard as project managers as well if you are<\/p>\n\n\n\n

323
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delivering something in a way that you don’t think you should be delivering it’s not giving the<\/p>\n\n\n\n

324
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benefit and then you’ve got to it’s it’s a really difficult thing to do not impossible but it is<\/p>\n\n\n\n

325
00:31:24,840 –> 00:31:32,680
difficult and I think it’s a case of I get caught kind of giving my opinion too much sometimes<\/p>\n\n\n\n

326
00:31:33,640 –> 00:31:37,640
but as you say the helps build those you build really strong relationships with your team then but<\/p>\n\n\n\n

327
00:31:37,640 –> 00:31:43,880
then your tent kind of hunker down underneath your shield of all of your trying to it’s you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

328
00:31:43,880 –> 00:31:48,280
against the world which creates a great culture but not necessarily an organisation culture<\/p>\n\n\n\n

329
00:31:48,280 –> 00:31:55,720
what do you actually do to break that? How do you would because I understand where it comes from<\/p>\n\n\n\n

330
00:31:55,720 –> 00:32:03,320
how do you stop yourself getting into that hole? The first step to every single behavioural change<\/p>\n\n\n\n

331
00:32:03,320 –> 00:32:08,520
is awareness and so the first thing you have to do is see if you actually are being negative<\/p>\n\n\n\n

332
00:32:08,520 –> 00:32:15,400
and so like what does negative mean and it’s literally agreeing to someone’s negativity it’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

333
00:32:15,400 –> 00:32:23,000
venting and to start kind of counting when that occurs especially with who and when within your<\/p>\n\n\n\n

334
00:32:23,000 –> 00:32:29,080
within your day it can be with certain people it can be in certain meetings but it’s very important<\/p>\n\n\n\n

335
00:32:29,080 –> 00:32:33,240
once you build that level of awareness you’ll see what percentage of your conversation generally<\/p>\n\n\n\n

336
00:32:33,240 –> 00:32:40,040
is you complaining about things and that level of awareness then kind of starts building the<\/p>\n\n\n\n

337
00:32:40,040 –> 00:32:46,280
pause between you being negative or not because what we need to do is build some semblance of control<\/p>\n\n\n\n

338
00:32:46,280 –> 00:32:51,080
over your reactions and so once you get the information of when you’re being negative you then start<\/p>\n\n\n\n

339
00:32:51,080 –> 00:32:55,880
saying well you know what’s happening that’s causing me to be negative within these moments something<\/p>\n\n\n\n

340
00:32:55,880 –> 00:33:00,760
I’m unhappy about is it certain people am I trying to connect with the relationships is this the culture<\/p>\n\n\n\n

341
00:33:00,760 –> 00:33:07,400
that we’ve created and so then once you realize who it is and when it is you can start building some<\/p>\n\n\n\n

342
00:33:07,400 –> 00:33:14,120
interruptions into those moments I would start small I would pick maybe one meeting one project one<\/p>\n\n\n\n

343
00:33:14,120 –> 00:33:20,280
person and and just give yourself a challenge that whenever something is negative like you maybe even<\/p>\n\n\n\n

344
00:33:20,280 –> 00:33:23,960
I would actually say build a script to prepare on how you’re going to respond and what you’re going<\/p>\n\n\n\n

345
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to say to those people so you so you don’t automatically lean into your kind of normal behavioural<\/p>\n\n\n\n

346
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of conversational tendencies and then try it out and see what happens it will be disruptive because<\/p>\n\n\n\n

347
00:33:36,760 –> 00:33:41,400
the people that used to use you to complain are not not going to be able to and so they’re going<\/p>\n\n\n\n

348
00:33:41,400 –> 00:33:49,560
to feel something is missing initially you might actually create some a discomfort with certain<\/p>\n\n\n\n

349
00:33:49,560 –> 00:33:54,760
relationships and certain people and you’re going to have to be willing to deal with that so what is<\/p>\n\n\n\n

350
00:33:54,760 –> 00:33:59,640
your plan of action there and so working with if you’re working with a coach in this conversation<\/p>\n\n\n\n

351
00:33:59,640 –> 00:34:03,960
generally you explore your feelings you explore the situations you explore the issue you kind of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

352
00:34:03,960 –> 00:34:08,600
brain dump in a safe space and you come up with these strategies and what you’re going to say<\/p>\n\n\n\n

353
00:34:08,600 –> 00:34:14,680
what your tactics are and then you also kind of strategize around what what do you do afterwards so<\/p>\n\n\n\n

354
00:34:14,680 –> 00:34:20,120
depending on the response from the people around you what are the positive things and then what salute<\/p>\n\n\n\n

355
00:34:20,120 –> 00:34:25,160
what can you move people towards from a solution perspective that’s going to create more positivity<\/p>\n\n\n\n

356
00:34:25,160 –> 00:34:31,720
from written communication from your own presentations to how you’re conversing within projects<\/p>\n\n\n\n

357
00:34:31,720 –> 00:34:37,880
themselves now I’m making this bigger than it really is because it could be as simple as don’t say<\/p>\n\n\n\n

358
00:34:37,880 –> 00:34:44,120
anything and move people on to the next task could be just that simple but I’m kind of just kind of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

359
00:34:44,120 –> 00:34:51,160
speaking about all versions of severity when it comes to negativity because some cultures can be<\/p>\n\n\n\n

360
00:34:51,160 –> 00:34:57,000
pretty pretty negative but but generally it takes practice to be able to take something negative<\/p>\n\n\n\n

361
00:34:57,000 –> 00:35:02,440
and to reframe it into something positive and solution oriented in positive work environments<\/p>\n\n\n\n

362
00:35:02,440 –> 00:35:07,080
I’d even I’d even kind of tell people to pay attention to leaders within the meetings pay<\/p>\n\n\n\n

363
00:35:07,080 –> 00:35:11,880
attention to the executives generally executive leaders in an organization generally and all the time<\/p>\n\n\n\n

364
00:35:12,680 –> 00:35:18,280
we’ll do this they will kind of show you in role model how they can take something negative people<\/p>\n\n\n\n

365
00:35:18,280 –> 00:35:22,440
complaining and turn it into something positive because they’ve learned over the years that’s why they<\/p>\n\n\n\n

366
00:35:22,440 –> 00:35:28,120
were in their positions that being a being darkness in an organization has some pretty severe<\/p>\n\n\n\n

367
00:35:28,120 –> 00:35:33,640
impacts on their projects and progress so part of it is also kind of looking towards role models<\/p>\n\n\n\n

368
00:35:33,640 –> 00:35:40,440
and for examples too. Parts are really interesting because it kind of is it the extreme end of the<\/p>\n\n\n\n

369
00:35:40,440 –> 00:35:46,360
politics sort of thing of ready whether the politician being ruled by a news anchor or whatever and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

370
00:35:46,360 –> 00:35:52,440
and then sort of turning a negative around that’s probably at the extreme end but I can see I can see<\/p>\n\n\n\n

371
00:35:52,440 –> 00:35:58,440
where I’ve seen that modeled with some of the senior leaders who I’ve got lots of respect for in<\/p>\n\n\n\n

372
00:35:58,440 –> 00:36:04,920
in organizations I’ve with that who have been very frank and very straight with people<\/p>\n\n\n\n

373
00:36:05,720 –> 00:36:16,360
but also take what can be a challenging question challenging situation but play it back<\/p>\n\n\n\n

374
00:36:16,360 –> 00:36:22,200
in their mind on the what we’re looking for we’re looking to how to move forward and it’s I think<\/p>\n\n\n\n

375
00:36:22,200 –> 00:36:27,640
something that’s really useful because I’m for me I think it’s something I need to again add into my<\/p>\n\n\n\n

376
00:36:28,920 –> 00:36:37,720
checklist of how am I doing sort of at the moment because I think it’s something you slip into it’s a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

377
00:36:37,720 –> 00:36:42,360
habit isn’t it it kind of thing you’ve got to build that habit again as you say that practice that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

378
00:36:42,360 –> 00:36:50,360
habit’s got to be there so it habitually you stop pause think react rather than just react with your<\/p>\n\n\n\n

379
00:36:50,360 –> 00:36:57,560
current emotional in a chimp feeling of this is all a bit shit I don’t like it and be able to say<\/p>\n\n\n\n

380
00:36:57,560 –> 00:37:03,480
yeah I know what you mean I understand why you feel that way to your your team and say but look I’m<\/p>\n\n\n\n

381
00:37:03,480 –> 00:37:11,720
looking at it this way and and just that you’ve acknowledged it you’ve empathized and you’ve given<\/p>\n\n\n\n

382
00:37:11,720 –> 00:37:16,600
a different view and and as you say all of as you say sometimes at that point you can go yeah I know<\/p>\n\n\n\n

383
00:37:16,600 –> 00:37:21,400
I know I understand why you feel that way but we can’t do anything at the moment let’s move on<\/p>\n\n\n\n

384
00:37:21,400 –> 00:37:27,400
and that that’s just saying nothing in some ways or not acknowledging it is difficult<\/p>\n\n\n\n

385
00:37:27,400 –> 00:37:32,440
but it’s just I think I need to be better at some areas I need to be better at monitoring myself<\/p>\n\n\n\n

386
00:37:32,440 –> 00:37:40,120
because I can get drawn down into oh whoa is me and let’s all get together and drink a bottle of rum<\/p>\n\n\n\n

387
00:37:40,120 –> 00:37:46,120
and moan yeah and some great resources nonviolent communication and crucial conversations are<\/p>\n\n\n\n

388
00:37:46,120 –> 00:37:49,800
two really good books within how to stay goal oriented within difficult situations<\/p>\n\n\n\n

389
00:37:49,800 –> 00:37:56,120
and this is this is I’m sorry everyone if you’re listening to this and you do like the gripe and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

390
00:37:56,120 –> 00:38:00,440
you have your people that you like to do it with do you want to have a higher level position you want to be<\/p>\n\n\n\n

391
00:38:00,440 –> 00:38:06,440
more senior in a company this is one trait that needs to stop it literally you need to do a hard<\/p>\n\n\n\n

392
00:38:06,440 –> 00:38:12,440
stop you need to figure out vent vent to your friends but the the one thing I could give a lot of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

393
00:38:12,440 –> 00:38:17,400
presentations on executive presence I’ve worked in companies all across the globe the one thing that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

394
00:38:17,400 –> 00:38:23,400
will resonate is if you are the optimistic realist that is goal oriented solution oriented<\/p>\n\n\n\n

395
00:38:23,400 –> 00:38:28,280
and it’s able to listen to someone’s concerns to not add to them instead to transform them to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

396
00:38:28,280 –> 00:38:33,320
results for a company and that means basically that you can’t vent and you can’t be negative<\/p>\n\n\n\n

397
00:38:33,320 –> 00:38:38,280
and it will make us it will make such a big difference for your brand and for your results<\/p>\n\n\n\n

398
00:38:38,280 –> 00:38:43,240
but it will be it will be it will feel like you lost something in a company 100% will<\/p>\n\n\n\n

399
00:38:43,240 –> 00:38:47,320
but just like you don’t want a friendship where you’re constantly complaining<\/p>\n\n\n\n

400
00:38:47,320 –> 00:38:50,440
I actually this happened the other day I went to go work out with the bud<\/p>\n\n\n\n

401
00:38:51,240 –> 00:38:55,320
and we had some really sad topics we had some really negative topics and we were sitting there the<\/p>\n\n\n\n

402
00:38:55,320 –> 00:39:00,520
last 15 minutes of our workout kind of sharing back and forth about how terrible something was<\/p>\n\n\n\n

403
00:39:00,520 –> 00:39:07,160
and we left the gym we’re like felt heavy and felt negative and we’re just like that this feels<\/p>\n\n\n\n

404
00:39:07,160 –> 00:39:11,640
bad like this isn’t feel good that’s what people even though you might feel like a release with<\/p>\n\n\n\n

405
00:39:11,640 –> 00:39:15,800
venting there’s a lot of research that shows that it actually accentuates the negativity within<\/p>\n\n\n\n

406
00:39:15,800 –> 00:39:21,000
somebody and so that’s what you’re doing you’re putting fuel to the fire and I’m highly recommend<\/p>\n\n\n\n

407
00:39:21,000 –> 00:39:25,800
just I’m annoying I’m emphasizing this a lot a highly recommend it’s just one thing you change it to this<\/p>\n\n\n\n

408
00:39:25,800 –> 00:39:32,760
yeah that’s brilliant I know just the time is just flown by I’ve just noticed and we’re coming up on time<\/p>\n\n\n\n

409
00:39:32,760 –> 00:39:39,560
with that and I but I think it’s such a powerful just that one snippet and that’s just one<\/p>\n\n\n\n

410
00:39:39,560 –> 00:39:45,480
snippet that we’ve talked about this in your book and this 60 other ones so yeah I find that really<\/p>\n\n\n\n

411
00:39:45,480 –> 00:39:52,760
useful already so I just wrapping up really was there anything that you wanted to mention<\/p>\n\n\n\n

412
00:39:52,760 –> 00:39:56,600
that we haven’t got too over you got a copy of myself you showed that the book there are waving<\/p>\n\n\n\n

413
00:39:56,600 –> 00:40:05,240
in front of you will see it yeah becoming through this so there we go so honestly it’s just it’s<\/p>\n\n\n\n

414
00:40:05,240 –> 00:40:09,800
really just that you are in control of your job you’re in control of how you show up every single day<\/p>\n\n\n\n

415
00:40:09,800 –> 00:40:14,840
and I wish someone showed me you know taught me this a little bit earlier that the only one that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

416
00:40:14,840 –> 00:40:19,480
can waste your time is you and so depending on the situations that you’re in let’s make the most of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

417
00:40:19,480 –> 00:40:24,760
them and generally that relates to becoming fearless check out the book it’s you know it’s everywhere<\/p>\n\n\n\n

418
00:40:24,760 –> 00:40:30,680
ebook audio and so on as paperback and if you enjoy it leave a review because it makes a really big<\/p>\n\n\n\n

419
00:40:30,680 –> 00:40:35,720
difference and if you enjoyed a lot semi-message on LinkedIn or books some time with me to do my website<\/p>\n\n\n\n

420
00:40:35,720 –> 00:40:40,120
would love to hear from you all right brilliant so that’s I guess that’s the best place for people to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

421
00:40:40,120 –> 00:40:44,840
get in touch and follow up if they want to find out some more either of those channels<\/p>\n\n\n\n

422
00:40:44,840 –> 00:40:51,160
yeah the website to live for yourself consulting.com let’s live for yourself consulting.com just like<\/p>\n\n\n\n

423
00:40:51,160 –> 00:40:57,960
how spelled just like it’s how you hear it and then dr. Benjamin Ritter on LinkedIn I’m trying<\/p>\n\n\n\n

424
00:40:57,960 –> 00:41:04,440
to be pretty active there brilliant hope and thank you so much for your time I’ve I’ve learned<\/p>\n\n\n\n

425
00:41:04,440 –> 00:41:09,240
something I’ve got some actions that I’ve got to take myself out and I’m sure that the listeners<\/p>\n\n\n\n

426
00:41:09,240 –> 00:41:14,440
will have the the same sort of benefit of this so you have a wonderful rest of your day and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

427
00:41:14,440 –> 00:41:18,360
speak soon. You as well thanks for having me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

428
00:41:18,360 –> 00:41:19,880
Cheers Ben.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dr. Benjamin Ritter Dr. Benjamin Ritter, is an award-winning leadership and career coach, author of the Amazon best-seller Becoming Fearless, and founder of Live for Yourself (LFY) Consulting. He spreads the message of becoming fearless in your career and life as a Top LinkedIn Voice, and host of two podcasts, The Executive and Live Fearlessly. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":769,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[154],"tags":[171,173],"class_list":["post-868","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-podcast","tag-project-management","tag-storytelling"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/Coming-Up-Phone-3.png?fit=1080%2C1920&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/868","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=868"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/868\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":871,"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/868\/revisions\/871"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/769"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=868"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=868"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nigelcreaser.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=868"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}